Distractions and Behaviour

Distractions are undoubtedly the best way to make sure that your family, friends, and other people from finding out that you stuffed something up. But whats strange and confusing is when you distract yourself from noticing issues.

Pretty much since the start of school till about early last week I was distracting myself with computer, TV, school work and other things when usually I'd spend more time reflecting on stuff. For while it lasted, I though that everything was pretty much back to a state on control (except that I still couldn't manage play time and work time properly). Then for some reason I realised that all I was doing was just delaying it and shoving whatever there was down to the back of my brain (also where all my unused things go like how to read, write chinese). At that time, I just... I guess I became a zombie/ robot where everyday is the same routine, not much thought into anything at all. I don't know, but something tells me that distracting myself isn't the best thing to do.

Obviously as you grow up you chose role models and what you want to become and how you want to be. Then theres the other side, judging what they want to be by deciding what they don't want to become. I'm definatly the latter, all I know is that what I don't want. Is that even any good? There's like a near same thingish thing on Dr. Phil (don't ask why I was watching, I just was) where he asked a woman whether her wanting a husband was from wanting to be with someone or not wanting to be alone. She replied not wanting to be alone and Phil said thats not a good answer. If you think about it he's got a point, but how does it relate to not wanting to become someone? No idea.

On everything that I post here, I don't mind talking about it mainly cause the only people that are supposed to know of it are people that I trust. Talking about it is'nt much of an issue either cause well... again you guys aren't really the spamming tell everyone I know type of people. (Sigh) It's definately times like these when God just makes everything so much easier.